MWC News - Early Edition

R.A. vonSchmidt Details Lantern Rouge Training Regimen

5 time Lantern Rouge winner, R.A. vonSchmidt gave an impromptu interview last night at the local watering hole, Ironberg Springs Hofbrau where this reporter happened upon him enjoying a pint of his favorite bier. Many have wondered what it takes to finish dead last time and again: the strength of will, the weakness of legs, the dedication. When asked to describe his preparation process for his run at a sixth consecutive Lantern Rouge, vonSchmidt gave his surprisingly basic program: 
1 - Beer
2 - Kids
3 - More Beer
One can only assume that with this level of resolve, the Red Light of Mediocrity will once again shine bright in the window of the vonSchmidt compound tomorrow evening.

Stijn Cherry Defends His Go-Slow Racing Style to Detractors

While no one who has any knowledge of the pedigree of SanRaflaanders hardman, Stijn Cherry, would think to questions his palmares, questions have quietly risen as of late about his actual chances at winning either of the two Marin World Cup races. Critics point to his "Slow is Fast" doctrine as being outdates and no longer effective in today's high octane peloton. When questioned about his detractors, Cherry invoked the old Tortoise and the Hare parable, claiming that, after the carnage at the front in the upcoming fake-races, he alone would still have the ability to finish first. A local journalist ventured to make the point that none of the other riders were likely to take naps during the Marin-Roubaix to which Cherry replied, "The Hare never had to compete against Stijn Cherry."


Questions Swirl Amid Lodewick's Performance in Today's Nikaseeo Kermesse.
Bookmaker's odds on Jonas Lodewick winning his 4th consecutive Marin-Roubaix tomorrow had dropped to a paltry 2:5 as recently as last evening, his surprising mid-fake-race withdrawal from the weekly Nikaseeo Kermesse this morning has caused his odds of winning to jump to a mere 6:1. Lodewick, who has looked to have good form in the recent mid-week classic Tour of Pt Reyes, has likely raised more questions than he answered with his no-show in the Nikaseeo Sprint and subsequent mid-point turn off. Never again seen in the bunch in the run up to the finish, Lodewick avoided all press and his camp has not issued comment at this time. 

Unibet.com Posts Odds for Marin-Roubaix Favorites

Lodewick's no longer favorite after mid-race withdrawal from Nikaseeo Kermesse this morning.

S. Cherry	40:1
A. Clijisters	8:1
M. Clijisters	10:1
H. Drümme	15:1
K. Drümme	9:1
M. Foley	28:1
K. Hushvod	5:2
S. Lengyll	6:1
J. Lodewick	3:1
D. Lyndsee	25:1
J. Robinski	scratch
T. Thomas	15:1
B. Van derStandish	25:1
R. vonSchmidt	500:1
V. vonSimeon	85:1

Proposition Bets:

3:5   Lodewick crashes

3:1   Hushvod Goes Off Course

2:1   vonSchmidt Finishes Last

5:1   Cherry has a punture

6:1   Cherry has LESS than 2 patches on punctured tube

2:1   Cherry has MORE than 2 patches on punctured tube

1:2   M. Clijisters Starts-Marin-Roubaix:

10:1   A. Clijisters Starts Marin-Roubaix

6:1   Foley hits a pole/gate/obstacle

20:1  Someone other than Hushvod wins intermediate sprint

2:5 Winning move happens on Railroad d'Arenberg

Dometic "incident" reported at Markus Clijisters San Anselmo Estate

Will it be Clijisters or Stevensteers at the Marin Roubaix start line?

Just days before the start of the 2013 Marin Roubaix, a domestic "incident" was reported at the Markus Clijisters estate in picturesque San Anselmo.

Neighbors in this exclusive neighborhood reported hearing a heated argument Thursday evening.  A San Anselmo police cruiser was dispatched to the gated estate.

The argument was reportedly over which family member should be at the Marin-Roubaix start line Sunday, March 17th. Both cannot be at the start-line due the care of their daughter, under 4 skuut world champion Daniela Clijisters.

While Markus Clijisters has been a veteran of the Marin World Championships and a former San Raflannders champion, his form, commitment and love of Sierra Nevada Pale Ale has been questioned. One vocal critic, according to several reports, has been Kaiser Permanente rider and wife Angelica Stevensteers. While both Clijisters and Stevensteers "had no comment" regarding the incident, neighbors reported hearing an extremely heated argument over who had the better chance of claiming a victory for the family. 

Neighbors reportedly could hear Stevensteers yelling, "Frankly, you're fat, and what have you won lately?  It is my turn to bring an overall championship into this house.  Winning is in my blood!" Clijisters poor performance of late and his absence at the epic mid-week Tour of Point Reyes would confirm this criticism.  It is assumed that Stevensteers mention of "winning is in the blood" refers to sister Eveleena mild success in the Women's Pro Tour, a lesser known race series than the PHRO.

Calls to race organizer and president Joos Litvalk to confirm the Sunday's start list have not been returned.

Marin - Roubaix Route Released

On Eve of MWC Opener, PHRO Makes Course Changes Official

With a scant 4 days remaining until the annual rite of spring, the Marin World Cup, PHRO President and Chairman of Sitting In Chairs Joos Litvalk today announced the office race route for this years gladiatorial role of the dice known as Marin-Roubaix. While following the traditional counter-clockwise direction around the Camp Chinois, there are a couple of minor changes from years past.

Most notably and perhaps disappointingly, is the removal of the Pau Clouf section of golf cart track that has traditionally served as a bit of an amuse-bouche for the riders before they tackled the famed pavé of the route. While always a popular section, a United Union of Greenskeepers strike has closed Pau Clouf for all sporting endeavors. Rumours that former fake-race Campionissimo, Jens Wynachtskenhoff engineered the strike in an attempt to gain publicity for his soon to be released memoir "L'Homme Grande Terrible" are, as yet, unconfirmed.

To fill the void left by the departure of Pau Clouf, a new sector, Pointe Camp Chinois, has been added as the first sector of pavé  bringing the total to 8. Included at the last minute in 2012, "le Pointe" as it's know to the locals, will certainly serve as a fitting first course.

As in years past, Marin-Roubaix will start at the former meeting hall of the Hushvod Boosters Club, at 1000 Bst in San Rafaaeel at 3:30pm and will finish with 1 1/2 laps of the track at L'Ecole d'San Rafaaeel stadium.

PHRO Drops RVSR Course Map at Press Conference

Litvalk Claims "Hardest Route Ever"
(but he says that every year...)

At the highly anticipated press conference today, PHRO Dictator in Chief Joos Litvalk revealed the route for the 2013 Ronde von SanRaflaanderran in a ceremony that was notable for it's unusual lack of pomp and circumstance. 

What was notable however, was the parcours itself which featured several never before used bergs as well as an unusually high number of lengthy offroad sectors. The inclusion of the new "Fishberg," a brutally steep, unpaved berg that is over 1km in length, and a nearly two km section of gravel road dubbed "La Ligne de Sud Marin" were a tie for most notable development this year. Those riders who manage to navigate the lengthy Ligne de Sud with a puncture will be rewarded for their efforts with the slippery dirt wall of the Fishberg.

Also announced was the now traditional route of the Marin-Roubaix which for the past decade has been run in the counter-clockwise direction, ending in the stadium of "L’Ecole d’San Rafaaell." 

Check back next week for our route analysis and other news as it develops.

Route Maps are available below for your viewing pleasure:

Details Leak on 2013 RVSR Route

While the course of Ronde von SanRaflaanderran is not generally a closely held secret, PHRO has gone to great lengths this year to keep the parcours under wraps until two weeks from the start. With a Press Conference scheduled for March 3rd, it is widely assumed that PHRO Chairman of the Bored, Joos Litvalk will present the full course at the event. However with just under three weeks until the traditional season opener Marin-Roubaix kicks off the Marin World Cup, this columnist has learned from confidential sources of several key components of this year SanRaflaanderrs route:

According to the source, the route this year will include several prolonged dirt/gravel sectors which is a marked contrast to recent editions which have had the key points in the fake-race occur on paved climbs. The move by PHRO to expand the off-pavement sectors of the route are likely a response to pressure by the fans to liven up the latter sections of the contest. 

Also, the riders will allegedly contest a key new section, the Southern Marin de l'Arbre, a 4.8km portion of seldom used gravel road stretching from near the summit of the Camino-Berg and exiting above the Woodland-berg. 

Perhaps the most interesting detail to be learned is that none of the standard fare key bergs from years past such as the Kingberg, Redwoodberg, Havenberg or Ironberg will be included. Instead a trio of little known climbs will be featured including the Upper-Toyonberg, the Fossberg and, what could to prove to be the decisive climb of the fake-race, the Fishberg, a fearsome 1.2km gravel wall featuring grades up to 18%. Also included in the standard 11 berg roster will be the gravel Sorichberg and Lagoberg.

More details are sure to come. Check back later this week for our Contenders/Pretenders/Retreads breakdown.

Marin World Cup 2013

Marin World Cup

2013

Marin-Roubaix

Sunday, March 17

3:30pm

Ronde von SanRaflaanderran

Sunday, March 24th

3:30pm