MWC News - Early Edition

R.A. vonSchmidt Details Lantern Rouge Training Regimen

5 time Lantern Rouge winner, R.A. vonSchmidt gave an impromptu interview last night at the local watering hole, Ironberg Springs Hofbrau where this reporter happened upon him enjoying a pint of his favorite bier. Many have wondered what it takes to finish dead last time and again: the strength of will, the weakness of legs, the dedication. When asked to describe his preparation process for his run at a sixth consecutive Lantern Rouge, vonSchmidt gave his surprisingly basic program: 
1 - Beer
2 - Kids
3 - More Beer
One can only assume that with this level of resolve, the Red Light of Mediocrity will once again shine bright in the window of the vonSchmidt compound tomorrow evening.

Stijn Cherry Defends His Go-Slow Racing Style to Detractors

While no one who has any knowledge of the pedigree of SanRaflaanders hardman, Stijn Cherry, would think to questions his palmares, questions have quietly risen as of late about his actual chances at winning either of the two Marin World Cup races. Critics point to his "Slow is Fast" doctrine as being outdates and no longer effective in today's high octane peloton. When questioned about his detractors, Cherry invoked the old Tortoise and the Hare parable, claiming that, after the carnage at the front in the upcoming fake-races, he alone would still have the ability to finish first. A local journalist ventured to make the point that none of the other riders were likely to take naps during the Marin-Roubaix to which Cherry replied, "The Hare never had to compete against Stijn Cherry."


Questions Swirl Amid Lodewick's Performance in Today's Nikaseeo Kermesse.
Bookmaker's odds on Jonas Lodewick winning his 4th consecutive Marin-Roubaix tomorrow had dropped to a paltry 2:5 as recently as last evening, his surprising mid-fake-race withdrawal from the weekly Nikaseeo Kermesse this morning has caused his odds of winning to jump to a mere 6:1. Lodewick, who has looked to have good form in the recent mid-week classic Tour of Pt Reyes, has likely raised more questions than he answered with his no-show in the Nikaseeo Sprint and subsequent mid-point turn off. Never again seen in the bunch in the run up to the finish, Lodewick avoided all press and his camp has not issued comment at this time.